Blessed by Angels Everywhere

According to the Oxford Dictionary, an "angel" is defined as "a spiritual being believed to act as an attendant, agent, or messenger of God, conventionally represented in human form with wings and a long robe."

Five and a half years ago, I titled this blog "Our Russian Angel" when I was praying for our own angel -- in the form of a child.  I didn't expect the robe and wings but instead have kept my eyes and ears open to messages relayed from God through Kristina and others.

Two weeks ago, on November 18th, my dad had a mini stroke.  I call my mom his angel on earth because she recognized the signs and got help immediately.  Never thought I'd say that a mini stroke was a blessing but it did lead to further testing that disclosed much more serious issues.  Last Tuesday, November 26, dad underwent open heart surgery to have a tumor removed from the aortic valve, repair the heart valve and have a bypass of the left descending artery that was 95% blocked.

Dealing with this entire situation was difficult for me being so far away (2715 miles away -- but who is counting?).  Thank goodness for Ma Bell!  I appreciated the daily updates, but hearing the concern and fear in my parents' voices...and the cracking of dad's voice as we said "goodnight, I'll talk to you later" really tugged at my heart.

What really touched all of us in the family was the outpouring of calls, messages, cards and prayers from around the world.  Seriously -- angels in the form of friends, family members, co-workers, acquaintances, etc!  I even consider the awesome cardiac surgeon who performed the procedure for dad an angel -- he delivered the message that dad still has a mission in this world!

Then last Tuesday, the day of the surgery, I received a call from another angel, in the form of a lifelong, dear friend.  The call left me in tears--he informed me that he had a ticket to FL waiting for 
me.  Oh my God - I was in shock.  I started making arrangements for work and care for Kristina.   I was on my way to be with my family!  Words will never be able to express our deep gratitude and appreciation.

So, here I am in FL, united with my family.  I spend the days with mom and dad at the hospital, dinners with my brother, Jim, sister-in-law Erin, and nephews Jimmy and Andrew.  I am missing Jon and Kristina immensely but talk to them often.

We hope that dad's oxygen levels improve so he can come home tomorrow, Tuesday, as I fly back to CA on Wednesday.  Every day he is getting better/stronger and considering all he has been through, we couldn't be happier.  The saga continues so stay tuned and please keep the prayers going...

Thank you, everyone, for being there.  In our book, you are all angels!!

Reunited with dad the morning after arriving in FL.  Mom elected to tell Dad about my visit ahead of time...he was going through a tough time on Thanksgiving and mom felt it would give him something to look forward to.  ;)

Dad has been getting some Physical Therapy (very minimal in my opinion) so here we are on our first lap around the nurse's station.  If we can get dad's oxygen level up from 89% to 93%, then they will feel more comfortable sending him home.

This picture is for you, Ken!  xoxoxox

Very Apropos Wish for November...

It was a dark, cool evening and I was reminded by a little someone that I had promised her that she could go rollerskating before dinner.  Ugh - this time change is killing me!!!  But I kept my word and gathered up keys and cell phone (heavens forbid I leave home without it...) and we headed out the door even though dusk was already in full swing.

As we traveled around the neighborhood, we practiced her "high frequency" words from school, talked about dreams, and stalked a few stray cats.

Towards the end of our walk, we came across a yard with dandelions.  I love that Kristina still sees dandelions as "flowers" vs "weeds".  Anyways, who can pass up the opportunity to pick the dandelion, make a wish and blow the seeds into the evening breeze (towards the neighbor's yard - not ours!)?

So Kristina announces "Hmmm, I have to make a wish."

Me:  "What would that wish be?"

Kristina (after tapping her chin as if in pensive thought...):  "I wish for 152 Lauras and 152 Jons."

Me:  "152 mommies and daddies?"

Kristina:  "Yeah, for the kids who don't have a mommy and a daddy."

Ugh - just warmed my heart.  I know with Christmas approaching, that the wishes will soon turn to puppies, Barbie stuff and other toys.  But for now, well, 152 would make a dent in the 153,000,000 orphans of the world.

Here's to you, kid, and I hope your wish for the children of the world comes true!!

 Love you, mommy   xoxoxo

Our Rollerskating Diva

My Hero

A hero is an ordinary individual who finds the strength to persevere and endure in spite of overwhelming obstacles.

~ Christopher Reeve

In all my forty-something years, I never realized the impact a little girl would have on my life.  Nothing is now as it was 5 years ago.  Yes, the days get crazy ~ running in different directions, attending PTA fundraisers, doing homework some nights for what seems like an eternity, and finding hairbands/Barbie shoes all over the house...  And you know what?  I wouldn't change a thing.

Why would I?

*  I am awakened on the weekend with a kiss on the cheek and a smile that makes her eyes squint.  How could one possibly say no to "Can I watch a movie in your bed?  I'll turn the volume down low..."?

*  I watch my little girl approach another child who is crying and she puts her arm around him and rubs his back.

*  Not a dog or cat can pass us on the street without Kristina kindly asking the owner "Can I pet your dog?" or telling them "Your dog is so cuuuute!".  Kristina wants nothing more than to have a dog...but that will have to wait until she can help with the responsibilities of a dog and we're not gone from the house for so many hours per day.

*  I laugh at the outfits Kristina puts on...many with mismatched crazy socks and (little girl) high heels...but somehow, still stylish enough that I don't make her go in and change --- it's just her style!

*  As "shy" as Kristina pretends to be around new family and friends, she quickly opens up and befriends them.  Even in grocery stores, Kristina has no problem going up to clerks to ask a question.  I swear this girl has walked this earth before....

*  I admire Kristina's sensitivity when the girls at school are not nice (oh, the drama....) and only hope she is learning from it so as not to perpetuate it.

Not a day doesn't pass that I am reminded about how much my daughter loves me.  She tells me often and when I ask her "How much do you love me?"~ I always get the response, "Big much!"  Some days I'm "mom", some days "mama" and most days "mommy".  It's a title I longed for for years and this little girl is the reason.

She is my hero.

For a little girl who spent the first 3 months of her life in a hospital (with, I'm sure, getting not much more than the mandatory attention a child must receive in order to thrive) and then the next 25 months in an orphanage, I am amazed at Kristina's zest for life. 

She is my hero, and I admire her tremendously.

I pray for many years to watch her grow and blossom into a beautiful young woman, to set and reach goals that her heart desires and to grab opportunities in life that otherwise she might not have had ~ had God not placed us together.

November is National Adoption Awareness Month....

and today, November 3, is Orphan Sunday.
 

With over 150 million orphans worldwide, my heart aches that there are children just like Kristina, who have yet to have the chance to call someone "mama", or have a dress to call their own without a grupa number stitched into it, to know the warmth of a sincere hug, or the luxury of crawling into bed and someone stroking their hair as a night-night story is read to them.

Every child deserves this, so I ask you --- if you can not bring a child into your family, please take a moment and say a prayer that someone, someday will open their heart to adoption.  It may not always be the easy road (is parenting supposed to be easy?), but the blessings are incredible.  There are many more heros out there....they just haven't been given the ingredient in life to realize it yet:  LOVE.

We love you, Kristina DeAnn!!!

And now....some photos of our (super) hero!



Nothing like a little pink in the hair to make a little girl happy!  :)

Striking a Super Hero pose

Kristina chose to be Bat Girl this year ~ so pretty in pink!

Bat Girl with her sidekick, Bat Man

Daddy pulled his Super Man abilities and was able to make it over to the parade during his lunch break!

Kristina's favorite part of the parade ~ greeting the fans!
 

Nana and Grampa were able to make it to see Bat Girl in action!

We attended a pre-Trick or Treating party and had a GREAT time.
Kristina was hanging out here with Mila and Elora.

Taking a 1-minute break from running to the next house while Trick or Treating.

Been watching the girls grow up over the years ~ incredible!

Oh, no...Zombies are in the neighborhood!!!

Kristina was thrilled to see her buddy, Gaby, since they no longer go to the same school!

Decisions, decisions....Kristina's school encourages all the children to give 50% of their candy to the men and women in the Armed Forces through Operation Gratitude.  Initially, Kristina was having a hard time parting with anything chocolate but in the end, the recipients will be very happy!!

Me and my hero.

Faith

To my dearest Kristina:

For years and years we prayed for you.  I can't begin to tell you how many prayers I said in church, while commuting in my car to work, sitting on the bench in front of Our Lady of Guadalupe, while walking my 3-mile route, etc., asking God to consider blessing me as a mom and dad as a daddy.  I always asked God to give me a "sign" as well as the insight to recognize it!  I would be lying if I said I just knew *for sure* it was going to happen....my faith was tested but not shaken.

Five years ago this week, you grabbed a hold of our hearts as we held you in our arms for the very first time.  Five years!  I just wanted to hold you, tell you everything was going to be ok, and after playing with you for 4 days, tell you that we would be back really soon.  But even then, nothing was a "sure thing." I had to go on faith.

It took 4 days but I finally got you to giggle!
I never wanted to let you go!

You and daddy on Day 1 -- he was smitten already!

So in love with our "daughter".

During the 7 months before we got the call to return to Russia, I referred to you as our daughter.  Every day.  A few people thought I might be jumping the gun.  "What happens if something changes?  You'll be hurt."  Yeah, things could have changed, and to say I would be devastated would be an understatement, but I couldn't even think about it.  You were meant to be my daughter, because I had faith.

And those signs I prayed for?

*  We attended our first "Adoption 101" class on January 9, 2007.  While we sat in that class, across the world it was January 10, 2007 --- the day you took your first breaths.

*  Daddy took some extra time to think about it but finally decided to adopt.  The words "OK, let's adopt" were told to me over dinner on July 23, 2007.  We received your referral and saw your photo one year later to the day on July 23, 2008.

*  The day after we received your referral, we called Brent and said we would like to officially accept Kristina's referral to be our daughter.  This was July 24th.  July 24th is the Feast Day of St. Christina.  (ok...I got the chills, did you???)

*  You were/are a towhead and your daddy, when he was young, was a towhead just like you!

Daddy at age 3

You at age 2 1/2.  Even your outfits are coordinated!!

*  Before we traveled to Russia, we had to decide on your full name.  Either keep it "Kristina", change it, add a middle name, etc.  Keeping Kristina was a sure thing...your were named in the hospital by your birthmother.  Besides giving you life, she gave you your name and it was our honor to keep it.  For a middle name, we decided on DeAnn ~ incorporating "Ann" since it represented my confirmation name (Anne), your Grammy's name (Marianne), your Nana's middle name (Tracey Ann), and your great-grandmother's name (Anne).  When in Russia, we signed the paperwork to accept your referral and declared we would call you "Kristina DeAnn".  We learned the name of woman who gave you life:  Anastasia.  Another sign.

Coincidences?  Perhaps....but my faith tells me from the depth of my soul that these are signs from God that you were sent directly from Him to us (only via Russia!).

Today, we put you on the path of following our Catholic faith --- you started CCD classes at St. John Eudes!  (In the old days, it was called "CCD" [Confraternity of Catholic Doctrine aka Catechism aka Sunday School] but now they call it "Children's Ministry".)  You were such a big girl as they called your name in the auditorium, you quickly gave us a kiss, and off you went with your class.  I still haven't heard how your day went as I had to work today and when I got home, you were sound asleep!  But I'm sure all went just fine....I have faith!

I love you with all my heart and more,

Mommy  xoxox

First day at CCD pictures:

Starting to spread your wings ~ right before going into your first CCD class.

You LOVE taking pictures at the fountain.
 And there's the mosaic of Our Lady of Guadalupe in the background!

A very pensive look...yet still posing!

And your first CCD class teacher, Ms. Sandy!

And now that it's Fall, I really have to get my "Summertime Summary" posted which includes our long-awaited Disney vacation.  Stay tuned!  ;)

 

 

*Note:  I love to include photos of Kristina on Trips 1 and 2 not because I love re-living those wonderful times but because at the time, we were not allowed to publish these photos online or in blogs.  Since this is Kristina's story, I want to include photos from way back when so they will be captured in her own storybook...my version of a babybook!  :)

First Grader, Front and Center!

By far, this was the fastest summer in history.  Jam packed with so many activities (obviously, keeping me busy from posting any blog entries....as I've been reminded by several friends and family members!) ~ activities I will soon document, but tonight....the most important:  Kristina is officially in First Grade!

It took about 20 minutes to arouse our angel from her deep slumber this morning but once awake, the excitement in her step was evident.  Jon and I both took today off from work so we could escort her to school.  As we approached the school's gates, she saw her YMCA Director and yelled "I'm a First Grader today!"

Reading a book before going to sleep

Eating her favorite:  waffles and pancakes...carb loading for school!

Leaving for school with daddy, dada, papa...depending on her mood.
Today she was clingy...so it was dada.

Our big girl!

 

I'm so proud of my little angel.

 

When she caught up to fellow first-grader and neighborhood boy, Adam -- they raced to school together!

 First stop was the Kindergarten playground.  Instructions were to meet in her old classroom so her former teacher could announce to each child who their First Grade teacher is.  Kristina enjoyed seeing friends she hadn't seen in awhile but especially loved getting back on the Monkey Bars...even if only for a few moments.

That's our girl...catching up with the boys at the monkey bars...

...and then literally hanging out with them!

 As the bell rang, all the children filed into class and they took their originally assigned seats on the carpet. Kristina's spot was front and center (hmmm, maybe because she was quite the talker???).   Parents filled the sides and back of the classroom.  Mrs. F asked all the kids what they did over the summer and Kristina proudly announced "I went on a cruise!"  When asked "to where?", Kristina came up with "Ummm, just on a boat."  It was a little more than just a boat...but that's for another blog entry!

Mrs. F welcomes all the students back and calms their nerves about moving on.  Can you find Kristina?  This was her spot on the carpet all last year.

My heart began to pound as Mrs. F began to read kid's names and their new classroom.  There are 4 First Grade classes and one was preferred and one was not, two were wildcards.  When the 3rd classroom's names were called, they called out "Kristina" --- and it was for the teacher we had hoped for!  I felt tears come to my eyes and had to restrain from performing a Happy Dance right there in front of everyone.   ;)

We proceeded to Kristina's new classroom and were warmly welcomed by Mrs. K.

The school gives the teachers 10 minutes to welcome students and parents....and then parents have to leave.  We're thankful for this...some schools don't allow parents in the classroom on the first day - dropoff only!

Kristina and dada listen intently on what Mrs. K has to say.

 

After 10 minutes of introductions, finding her new desk (yes, up front and center), etc., it was time for the parents to leave. But this was too soon for Kristina. The bottom lip quivered, the tears silently fell -- and all I could do was to kiss the saltiness from her cheeks and encourage her to sit with the friends she already knew. Kristina had a death grip on me. I waited for Mrs. K to take notice that I wasn't able to vacate without some intervention, at which time she put her arm around Kristina and one other little girl having a hard time, and we were out of there. Sigh.

 

 

Kristina's new "home" -- the desk right up front!

 

The intense clinginess commences...

Two moments before meltdown...

At 1:23pm, Jon and I awaited outside the classroom door as class was dismissed.  A happy, joyful little girl ran up to us saying, "I had a great day, my teacher is sooooo nice!!  I like her alot!"

She ran down the ramp and couldn't wait to show us her folder FULL of homework for ME to complete (oodles of releases, emergency info, etc.).  Took over 90 minutes.

Very proud of her "Super Star" sticker and goody bag she received from Mrs. K.

Daddy's little girl

No tears now!

Operation First Grade Entry:  A Success!  And Kristina summed it up with a hand held high awaiting a high-5 exclaiming "and we all had a Green Day!"

Our toothless Angel Grin!

 

First Grader Stats:

Height:  46"

Weight:  42 lbs.

Size:  Wears 6x, but gradually starting to grow into 7s

Shoe size:  11

Bedtime:  8:30pm on school nights (but sometimes falls asleep by 7pm!)

Favorite foods:  Chicken Noodle Soup, Nutella sandwich, anything chocolate, buttered noodles with lots of parmesean cheese, cucumbers (peeled), sugarless gum

Favorite phrase:  "Are you kidding me?"

Favorite song:  "I Knew You Were Trouble" by Taylor Swift

Favorite Video:  Barbie and the Pop Star  (And constantly sings "Here I am...."!)

Favorite Book:  Dr. Seuss' Go! Dog, Go!

What she wants to be when she grows up:  Popstar on weekends, and a teacher and mommy during the week.

Loves to:  pet/cuddle with Dogs, color, use tape to wrap up anything, do her nails (over and over and over), sing in the shower, be held by mom in the am (although I see this quickly coming to an end as she's just getting too heavy for me...), play on the iPad, be first in line EVERYWHERE, dress in layers, .....and my favorite.....:  sneak into mommy and daddy's bed around 4am!

Mother's Day 2013

In the dark, I could see my child's face -- illuminated dimly by the Light-Up Pillow she got at Christmas.  As the coloring of her face turned shades of red, amber, white and blue -- I just stared at every feature of our angel.  The fact that she had her hands clasped below her chin as she lie on her side, it looked as if she was praying but the occasional twitching of her body signaled she was fast asleep.

I love these quiet moments.  Some nights when she crawls in with us, I just watch her sleep even tho' I should be fast asleep myself.  Sometimes I shed tears wondering how in the world I ever won the parent lottery.

Years ago, Mother's Day was a tough holiday.  A really tough one.  In church, they would always ask the mom's to stand up and the applause would dig that dagger into my heart a little bit deeper.  I kept the faith that one day I, too, would proudly stand up while clinging onto my child's hand and feel that applause was meant for me.

In 2009, we spent Mother's Day in Russia -- still in the middle of the "10-day wait" -- so we didn't have Kristina 24/7.  It was weird that the court had declared me Kristina's mother (on April 29, 2009) but at the end of the day, I was still leaving her in the care of other ladies.

But today, I *am* the Mama!  I'm cherishing every moment...even the ones when my patience runs low because our strong-willed, independent girl will primarily walk to the beat of her own drum.  She may not always act like an angel, but she is by far the greatest blessing Jon and I have received in our lives.

I will continue to hold this child in my lap for as long as I possibly can!!

Mother's Day at Nana's house
(and no, Nana and I did not coordinate our outfits...)



Celebrating Mother's Day 2013

Other Proud Mama-Moments....

Student of the Month

Two weeks ago, our daughter was Student of the Month at school.  Jon learned of this when I was out of town for 6 days down in San Diego for the yearly Occupational Therapy Conference.  The Student of the Month Awards are always handed out on Thursdays around noon so I was bummed that I would be out of town.  BUT for some reason, for the first time, the school scheduled the Awards Ceremony on a Monday --- our day off!

Kristina was buzzing with excitement in anticipation of getting her award!

The first student called up to receive her award!  Here she is with Mrs. Bae.

We brought some balloons to show how proud we were!

And here's her certificate (she also recieved coupons for roller skating and a local restaurant!).

Patience

We're getting things in order before our Disney Cruise in July (the one we're going on with 41 other families who have adopted children from Russia) and one of the things we've put off for too long was getting Kristina a USA passport.  The weekend we planned to get photos done, Kristina ran into the monkey bars at school and bruised her left cheek/eye --- which took over 3 weeks to heal.  Finally, we stood in line at the United States Postal Service for more than 2 1/4 hours and the application is officially being processed.  I give this girl the award for patience standing in line for so long.  Thank goodness I had my iPhone and iPad!!!



Mission Accomplished!

T-Ball Spring 2013

We've been trying a variety of activities to see where Kristina's interest lie...and T-ball was right up her alley.  She really enjoyed the season (especially playing in the dirt, socializing with a runner on the base she was covering, etc.) and when the season concluded today, I asked Kristina "What was the very best part of T-ball?"  Her response:  "Getting my very first trophy!!!"

Our T-ball player covering 2nd base

So, really -- what do 2 6-year olds discuss while hanging out on 2nd base??

First up for the Dodgers and getting last minute advice

Working it on 3rd base

The obligatory "smile for the camera for mom" shot...

And it's a hit!!!

The end-of-game-tradition:  "Good Game!"

So happy that Nana and Grampa were able to stop by to see the game!

The Kristina Deary cheering squad

We had 90 minutes to kill between end-game time and Awards Ceremony that our daredevil found much enjoyment on the Monkey Bars and play structure.

  Kristina is so independent that she doesn't mind playing by herself (or joining in with kids she doesn't know)...but it's times like this I wish she had a sibling...

Receiving congratulatory remarks from Coach Alex.

Kristina ran so fast to get her trophy I didn't have time to snap a shot of her receiving it.

"Wow - my very first trophy!"

The 2013 Mason Rec Dodgers!



With her Dodger-Blue nails, Kristina was thrilled that her trophy has her name on it!

Just hanging out!

My Little Multi-Tasker

Here she is calling daddy on the phone with her iPad under her arm walking to the car to go to church.
And yes, our fashionista chose/designed her outfit...

The fountain where Kristina makes wishes...such as "May all the children in the world have a mommy and daddy" and "Wishing our family to be happy."  One is covered and we continue to wish for the other....

Hmmm, maybe *not* so proud??

I know Kristina has various talents, like all children do, but I truly feel that Kristina thinks she's 26 in a 6 year old body!  One day, Kristina decided to cut her hair because she got Play-doh in her hair.  (??)  When asked why she cut it, she replied "Because daddy always says not to put anything down the bath drain and I didn't want the play-doh to go down the drain."  Sigh....

This took my breath away when I saw a chunk of her beautiful blonde hair missing.

At the salon deciding what to do...with orders from daddy: "Don't cut it short whatever you do!!"

If Kristina had her way, she would want it shorter than her shoulders ~ like Rapunzel at the end of Tangled!

We didn't even go as short as we should have...

Kristina helping to clean up her locks of blondness.

I could go on and on and on about "proud moments" but that's about enough for one blog post.   In closing, I'd like to copy the post I wrote on my Facebook wall on Mother's Day because it comes from my heart and I want Kristina to read this someday when I eventually make this blog into a book for her:

 

Happy Mother's Day to my mom: the woman who has supported me in every aspect of my life ~ from a little girl up until the present! Your daily calls as I commute to work are priceless and when I hang up, I thank God for you. I wish there weren't 3000 miles between us; I don't think we could be closer in heart, though! You have set the example of the mom I truly aspire to be.

Happy Mother's Day to Jon's Mom, Tracey: Over the last 30 years, you have been there in so many ways, but the night you spoke to Jon encouraging him to adopt so I could fulfill my dream to be a mom, was life changing to all our families. Kristina will always have memories of being your Saturday girl! There are not enough words to thank you for everything.

"Mother Russia": I am thankful beyond imagine that the opportunity was given to us to travel across the world to Russia so that one of their children could have a chance of love and life. I pray for every child left behind that they, too, have a chance to live, love and make their imprint on this world and know the comfort and warmth of a mother's embrace and words of love.

 

Thank you, Kristina, for making everyday Mother's Day!!!